WOO! 10k crossed! Nevermind I’m supposed to be at 20k today.
Roger looked around sadly as Chad got out his phone and dialed his insurance company. He had to hunt through his recent outgoing calls, but he found the number.
“Um, hi, I need to report an accident? … no, I don’t have my policy number, it was in my car and my car is kind of totaled. Yeah, it’s Huffington, Chad Huffington. … Yep, that’s me. Awesome! Okay, here’s the thing… me and my buddy went ice fishing and the jeep fell through the ice into the lake. It’s so cold out there it’s going to freeze right back over, so I’m not sure when they’ll be able to get it out, if at all, you know? What? Well, we only drove it on a little way. It’s Weehawken lake, you ought to be able to send someone out to look at it right?” He paused, and Roger saw him actually look a little flustered for once. “Well, we didn’t want to drill through the ice to make the fishing hole so we used a little firework kind of thing to make the hole. But you see, my friend had brought his dog, and… what? No, no, see, when we threw the firework thing out onto the ice, the dog retrieved it and he ran under the jeep and when it went off, it blew a hole in the ice and the jeep sank.”
Chad stopped and listened to the insurance agent, all the color draining from his face.
“What? But it was an accident! This is accident insurance, right? No, it damn well wasn’t my fault! My friend’s dog did it! And he only ran under there cos my friend panicked and — what? What do you mean it doesn’t matter? Collision accidents? What about theft and acts of god and stuff? Doesn’t this qualify under one of those? Are you fucking kidding me??? I just bought this car. I am NOT going to make payments for five years on a car I can’t even drive, this is insane! You must be able to — I don’t think I’m being unreasonable. What do I pay you clowns for? I’ve been a customer for years and …” there was a long pause. Chad’s face fell in defeat. Roger hadn’t seen him look this despondent in years. “Oh – okay. I guess that makes sense. Thanks. I guess. Bye.”
Roger looked at him. “What’s the story, man?”
“They say that I can try filling out the claim request just in case, but that there is no way the company will pay for my jeep because it was my own damn fault the thing got totalled.”
“So wait, you have to pay for the car even though it’s destroyed? Man, that’s brutal.”
“What the fuck am I gonna do, man? I sold my old car and used the money to buy this one. And with the car payments… shit. I am so screwed.”
“Yeah, it kind of looks like you are.” Roger shrugged. “You lost your car, I lost my dog, fuck this noise, let’s go get drunk. Sound like a plan?”
